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upcountry
6th Nov 2006, 15:36
for a Thai wife not to allow her husband to do any choirs around the house.????????
I for one am not allowed to wash any dishes, and basically anything which is related to cleaning and keeping the place tidy.
Feel like a little boy sometimes who has come home from a footy game up the park when she is running the bath for me....

upcountry
6th Nov 2006, 15:36
for a Thai wife not to allow her husband to do any choirs around the house.????????
I for one am not allowed to wash any dishes, and basically anything which is related to cleaning and keeping the place tidy.
Feel like a little boy sometimes who has come home from a footy game up the park when she is running the bath for me....

Nick1810
6th Nov 2006, 16:03
Upcountry

Peronally I don't do any singing at all in the house! :lol:

But I do some of the chores when I am allowed to! ;)

Seriously though - I know what you mean. Fon says it is her duty to do these things for me. Even her family told her before she came here that she must behave like this in the UK, ie look after me well and not be lazy!

I do my fair share of the cooking though - but 30 seconds after we finish eating and she has already started the washing up! :rolleyes:

Nick

Ivan
6th Nov 2006, 16:08
Nong was the same when she came to the UK.

Now it's "you make kitchen til'lak" lol
But as she has a small job now it's only fair.

colin244
6th Nov 2006, 16:25
upcountry & Nick,

Snap! I am not allowed anything of the cleaning nature as Dao says me not you and never mind the bath upcountry I have my nails inspected and cut frequently also Dao has tried to comb my hair (what little I have!) :eek:

Maybe its because Dao is new to UK but comments its her duty for her sammi!My mates think I'm in for a shock when Dao becomes westernised! :D

Enjoy while it lasts! :lol:
colin 244

Ron-Tik
6th Nov 2006, 16:42
upcountry, you are LUCKY,

When i was married to my now Ex Thai wife, the house wouldn't have been cleaned properly if I hadn't done it.
She wouldn't notice a cob-web even if she walked into one and I always had to clean the kitchen properly after she had finished cooking.

What annoyed me most was that she never learnt/took in the UK way of cleanliness no matter how many times I had shown her after 4 years in the UK.
Her idea of housework was a quick flick with a feather duster around the house for 5 minutes every week.

I am not one of those blokes who thinks its the wifes job to do all the household chores, but she was bone idle and would never attempt to do anything around the house unless I mentioned that this or that was dirty.

I remember one Sunday when i was going out to work, I mentioned that the outside window sills were very dirty. When i came home for a coffee in the afternoon she was cleaning them with a household mop that you clean the floor with. I asked her ''why dont you use a sponge/cloth etc?'' She said '' Not good for skin on hands '' :confused:

Maybe she had forgot the Marigold gloves were in the kitchen draw? I gave up :rolleyes:

Tik is completely different, a bit like the above post from Nick and Colin, manicuring, foot massage, wont let me do anything around the house that she sees as the Womens job, and when I started to mow the lawn she took over even though she had never mowed a lawn in her life.

Maybe its the Province, upbringing they come from, I wish I knew the answer, the Ex was from lop-Buri, Tik is from Khon Kaen.

lester
6th Nov 2006, 16:47
Sorry to hear your story , my misses you can eat your food off the floor when she has finished , here in London and same for all her mates here as well.

upcountry
6th Nov 2006, 16:56
I had to stop her laying my underpants out for me in the morning, it started to wind me up a bit..

Ron-Tik
6th Nov 2006, 17:21
quote from upcountry,

I had to stop her laying my underpants out for me in the morning, it started to wind me up a bit..

........................................................................................................................

Maybe the (wind) in your underpants made her realise they needed changing :lol:

lester
6th Nov 2006, 17:58
nothing to do with the province, North/South , all to do with their upbringing, surely you should have sussed that out at the beginning.

siamsteve
7th Nov 2006, 00:24
Same here we have arguments about who does the laundry. I am allowed to cook for Lek but that is it. If I go near the sink we are having a ruck. We have laminate flooring and Lek keeps cleaning with Pledge and I keep nearly killing myself everytime I go to the kitchen to cook. Do your ladings polish the floors with pledge? I have banned her from doing it but I know she still does.

SteveD
7th Nov 2006, 01:45
Enjoy it while it lasts!
My wife has a much more his & hers idea re: jobs around the home (or boat in our case). The inside is hers & the outside is definitely mine!
Steve

IanB
7th Nov 2006, 06:36
Same old story! Man will not do housework because wife will not let him! What nonsense! You are in the UK now, not Thailand. She does not have to harvest the rice, tend to the livestock, bring up the children, and keep the house running while you sit back and drink singha!

Iang works at least as hard as me, and at difficult hours, so naturally I help with cleaning, cooking, washing up etc.. And she is incredibly proud of that. Her sister and some Thai friends seem to be astonished.

It is not that they will not allow you to do the work - they do not expect you to want to.

Clearly, it is different if she is not working and you are, but even then, someone needs to give her a good talking to!

Ian

siamsteve
7th Nov 2006, 07:20
Calm down Ian I do all the cooking and I work 12 hour shifts and travel an hour each way to work and back and I will not go near the washing up otherwise she starts rowing with me and pushes in and takes over. I quite like washing up, its quite relaxing

Marcus
7th Nov 2006, 08:34
Originally posted by IanB:
Same old story! Man will not do housework because wife will not let him! What nonsense!

Totally agree Ian. :thumb:

There's nothing more pathetic than some lazy slob insisting he doesn't do anything around the house because his wife "won't let him".

Okay if she's not at work all day and he is, but even then the man ought to take on some of the jobs around the house.

But, hey, I don't know Mr and Mrs Upcountry. Perhaps it really is as he describes it - perhaps Mr Upcountry resents sitting watching TV while his wife runs him a bath and sorts out his smalls, but he's just totally powerless to do anything about it. :rolleyes:

ash
7th Nov 2006, 09:26
There's nothing more pathetic than some lazy slob insisting he doesn't do anything around the house because his wife "won't let him".


Not strictly true :lol: , I don't do it because I don't want to :blush: but I do work from 05:30 in the morning and cook at weekends etc etc.
I just even had to open my own marmite :cry:

ash

upcountry
7th Nov 2006, 09:38
Ian
Marcus
So whats it like to wear a dress then??

galahad
7th Nov 2006, 09:40
If the wife wants a lid or bottle opened,I,m your man ;)
Seriously though i try and help where i can which is mainly making 'my' food on usually alternate evenings.
I,m getting better at helping out;which is something new for a MCP like me.
Lessons learned from my previous marriage;and I don,t see why she should do everything especially as shes working too.
Still never used an iron though!!! :eek:

Marcus
7th Nov 2006, 10:08
Originally posted by upcountry:
So whats it like to wear a dress then??

I don't know. Perhaps we'd better ask an expert. Someone who starts a thread called Ladyboys asking if anyone's ever been tempted. Such a person is much more likely to have experimented with such things.

http://thailand-uk.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/9401035621/m/...741064561#5741064561 (http://thailand-uk.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/9401035621/m/9421044561?r=5741064561#5741064561)

Not that I'm knocking it mind. I don't care what anyone does for kicks so long as it doesn't harm others.

I just fear that sometimes you can't see the harm. One minute your wife is not letting you help out around the house, the next minute (or year, or decade) the harm's been done and there's no wife anymore.

Not that I can talk of course - I'm hardly an ideal example when it comes to successful relationships - but I think Ash's relationship sounds so much more healthy. He works hard away from the home, but still helps out when he can.

upcountry
7th Nov 2006, 10:31
Marcus
You need to learn a little self control and not read between the lines so much.

"or a Thai wife not to allow her husband to do any choirs around the house.????????
I for one am not allowed to wash any dishes, and basically anything which is related to cleaning and keeping the place tidy.
Feel like a little boy sometimes who has come home from a footy game up the park when she is running the bath for me....""


I drive 4 hours round trip a day for a 10-12 hour night shift, I cook at the weekend, my wife works locally 2 hours a day.

But then again you and Ian had already made your mind up about my reltationship with my wife and housework.....

lester
7th Nov 2006, 12:34
So who started the thread about ladyboys/? could not open the link

Peter
7th Nov 2006, 13:03
I am not allowed to do the dishes either. Something about "not doing them correctly".

BigRed
7th Nov 2006, 13:59
There's nothing more pathetic than some lazy slob insisting he doesn't do anything around the house because his wife "won't let him".


Quite agree, be a proper lazy slob like me and say "it's womens work". Once I moved to Yorkshire and married a Thai wife I knew I had found my spiritual home. ;)

BigRed

Mark W
7th Nov 2006, 14:02
Posted by lester
So who started the thread about ladyboys/? could not open the link

It's in the Departure Lounge so you cannot see it until you reach 100 posts.

lester
7th Nov 2006, 14:07
ok got a long way to go then..........

colin244
7th Nov 2006, 15:01
The more I try to help the more annoyed Dao gets so I have decided to take the peaceful route! ;)

One classic when I returned from work and asked what she had been up to apart from shopping with my mother was "I do I T" which upon further enquiries means the ironing! :lol: strangely I thought she had been on the computer "ting tong farang" was the response!

Anyway when we marry (she is on f/v) Dao intends to work so I think things may change at this point :help:
colin 244

upcountry
7th Nov 2006, 16:36
I have the perfect iron shape(with holes inclded) on my bedroom carpet floor where the missus didnt use an Iron board.

Mind you she didnt have one at the time, i think she was making a point...

robert d
7th Nov 2006, 17:17
up country,
same here i came home from work to find the kitchen rug with a lovely burn in it about th esame diameter as the bottom of a wok!!!!!.

colin244
7th Nov 2006, 17:25
upcountry,
In our case in her own words "this house have many things I look for what not have" NB the ironing board was already here as well as some other things she didn't expect including "Thai Pharmacin" big surprise forgetting she had bought it for me in Chiang Mai ie Golden Cup Balm!
colin 244

Cliff
8th Nov 2006, 03:24
Originally posted by Peter:
I am not allowed to do the dishes either. Something about "not doing them correctly". I've been told that I don't clean things properly and Thaiboi has insisted on cleaning again. However, rather than have him do everything around the house, I've started scrubbing harder to make sure I do it properly first time!

BigRed
8th Nov 2006, 05:37
welcome back Cliff, your postings have gone down of late.

BigRed

Marcus
8th Nov 2006, 08:34
Originally posted by upcountry:
Marcus
You need to learn a little self control and not read between the lines so much.

I drive 4 hours round trip a day for a 10-12 hour night shift, I cook at the weekend, my wife works locally 2 hours a day.

But then again you and Ian had already made your mind up about my reltationship with my wife and housework.....

Three points. Three responses.

1) Yes, I think I probably do need to improve my self-control. There are a good number of things I ought to work on. Thank you for pointing this out to me. However, I don't quite see how it applies to me within the context of this thread.

2) I can see that you do indeed work very hard. I can see how your wife will see to the major part of the domestic work in the house. However, you clearly have enough idle time on your hands to start threads on this forum asking if it is normal for people's Thai partners to do so much work.

Did you start this thread after a 12 hour night shift and a 4 hour drive while your wife was running the bath and sorting your smalls. I'm amazed at how you choose to spend what little free time you have.

3) Of course I can't speak for Ian, but generally I make up my mind about people on this forum (or any other) according to the information they themselves choose to share. If you don't tell people that you work 12 hours a day and drive 4 hours a day on top of that, how on earth do you expect people to know? No one can read your mind you know.

What you actually told us was that you are not allowed to help out around the house. What you did was to ask if that is normal. And in response to that - and the information that you have subsequently provided - I'd still say that no, it is not normal, nor should it be. But then again, now that you suddenly reveal that in fact you do the cooking at weekends, you clearly don't think it is normal or right either.

upcountry
8th Nov 2006, 11:39
Marcus
I have written a couple of paragraphs on here during my work time. nothing else.

No more sensless comments required.

sevorg
13th Nov 2006, 12:15
As a single man, my house equipped with as many labour saving machines as I can think of.But on a recent visit My GF refused to use the dishwashing machine, tumble dryer, microwave and most of the other "gadgets" I have to make my life easier.Even going so far as not to use the remote control on the television.Its not that she does not understand how to work them, she just does not want to, her way is better!!
You can lead a horse to water etc!!!!!!!!!!!!!