One reason why I'm more receptive to Shrek's actions than the majority is that I've seen too many people take advantage of the cultural tendency to 'keep the harmony'. And I know Thais who are sometimes grateful when someone else makes a stand. They may tut when the scene occurs but later they may notice and be pleased with the results. And so things change...
In the short run anger may work to coerce people to change. The shock factor may push them to exhibit temporary changes to avoid the imminent wrath. But in the long run they get inured to such coercive approach. They will then start to ignore it or adopt other responses. Anger as a motivating force for change thus loses its potency.
I think people behave or respond to circumstances in accordance with the best coping strategies available to them at the moment- vis a vis their stresses, skills and present resources. They change only if they perceive that the new behaviour is to the best of their interest.
That that is is. ~ Shakespeare, 'Twelfth Night'
dont end up like this....
Last edited by upcountry; 4th Jan 2013 at 20:23.
I am not an elected representative of other people's views here but I am willing to bet my luxury Mod's reclining chair that 99% of the members would not have read your comment above as meaning someone had given you a slap. Why? Because for those 99% of this Forum, aggressive behaviour by Thai people in Thailand involves voices raised in incomprehensible tongues or some impatience shown by a taxi driver. It does NOT involve them being 'given a slap'.
In 10 years in Thailand I was only ever physically assaulted once (I am not including my wife in this survey!) - and to be honest that one incident, where alcohol-fuelled bravado led to me responding with aggression, could have cost me my life.
Anyway, we can't be that awful because you keep coming back - and I think virtually everybody, even your detractors, would agree that the Forum is a more interesting place for that.
As someone suggested earlier, this thread has become a bit unwieldy after 60 pages, and I would guess that new arrivals might find it difficult to catch up so maybe it would be a good idea to post your next Tale under a new thread title, same as the old one with 2013 on the end or something similar?
Gordie T Geordie
The ultimate source of a happy life is warm-heartedness. This means extending to others the kind of concern we have for ourselves. On a simple level we find that if we have a compassionate heart we naturally have more friends. And scientists today are discovering that while anger and hatred eat into our immune system, warm-heartedness and compassion are good for our health.
It is great to be calm and polite when it is possible, it is not always possible to do!!
My bike is now back and guess what, after trying to give me back a dangerous unrepaired bike and losing the battle he started my bike is now done.
Not only is it done, it is done properly and even repaired stuff that was done prior to the accident and they were well aware that it was not accident damage.
IE a couple of scuff marks on the exhaust guard and a few other minor marks were fixed.
Why did they go the extra mile? because the father wanted to show that he was sorry for the problems and poor service they had given me.
The son was nowhere to be seen and apparently the family were not happy with his actions towards me.
I assume a lot of this sudden conscience was brought on by the fact through my lawyer i threatened to tell the insurance company.
So i am under no illusions at all, but it is due in some way top the fact i defended myself strongly and did not just say ok mai pen rai !!!
I had to adjust the headstock(steering) bearings in his shop myself as his attempt was rubbish, once shown how to do it quickly and properly he ( the father) was very receptive.
I was offered drinks and food and thanked for signing the forms so they could get paid, we discussed our previous meeting and it was nice to see they had realized their mistakes.
As a parting gesture of goodwill in acknowledgement of a good job finally done i tore up the lawyers letter removing the threat of being sued from them.
This brought a wai and hand shake from the father and a hug from mom..
I can only hope this encounter will drive them a little further towards good , decent and honest service to the next poor sole in my situation...
Had a great teachers day around the pool with a few drinks and friends and a pizza.
PS no other incidents or problems to report, funny that from a violent aggressive man!!!!
Glad you got it all sorted. More importantly I hope the physical damage to you is now healed.
One point though - no one has ever said you should have said 'mai pen rai' when this happened. I would have been as angry as you !
Well done on no further altercations since - thats a few weeks at least - is this a record ? :-)
The 2013 edition of shrek48's Thailand adventures continues in the topic below:
Tales of shrek48 - Life in Thailand 2013
Tobias - โทเบียส