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  1. #1
    Rookie มือใหม่
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    24 Jan 2013

    Default Advice needed on divorce/separation please

    My English husband of 20 years has left me with 2 children, both of whom under 18 years of age. He went in an 'adult' chatroom and started chatting to a 20-year-old girl in November last year. He met up with her for the first time in August this year (2018) while the children and I visited my family in Thailand. He admitted adultery and decided to leave us in November to start his new life with her in Birmingham. He is 50, soon to be 51. I live in East Sussex. We got married in Thailand. We have no mortgage. I am living with the children in a house that belongs to my father-in-law. My husband wants to come back to visit the kids fortnightly and wants to stay in the house he claims it is 'still his family home'.
    The kids were in distraught when their Dad left. My son is suicidal and very angry with everything. They adore their dad, did everything together and one morning they woke up and Dad was gone. It is heart-wrenching for me as their mother to see that. I am heart-broken and grieving too but it breaks my heart even more to see them cry every night.

    I am not sure what to do....whether or not I should divorce him now or wait. He has no saving but has a house for rent. What benefit or right do I have if I divorce him? What can I claim for 20 years of my life I spent with him? Will my children get anything? Will I be entitled to his future inheritance when his father passes away?
    Any advice please. I am stuck!

  2. #2


    Sorry to hear of your situation.

    You will get some advice on here from people who have been through this type of thing before but you would be better off speaking to a good divorce lawyer. You will be able to get some basic advice from your local citizens advice bureau who will no doubt recommend you a good lawyer.

  3. #3
    Guest Flip's Avatar
    Join Date
    14 Apr 2003


    I believe you will have rights to a share of your husband's inheritance but you need the advice of a solicitor urgently. As your husband has not actually been left the house yet (because his father is still living) - it is entirely possible that his father's will could be changed in order to stop you getting anything.

  4. #4
    Moderator Tobias's Avatar
    Join Date
    20 Jun 2003
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    crispyduck welcome to Thailand-UK, although I am sorry to learn of the circumstances that brought you back to us.

    You do need to seek professional legal advice here, this is vital so you can establish and protect the rights of both your children and yourself. Your husband is legally obliged to provide for you and his children. Contact your nearest Citizens Advice centre, you will be able to find them using this link:

    Citizens Advice will be able to point you in the right direction regarding safeguarding your home and your family. You may be entitled to free legal advice.

    The most important thing is to NOT agree to leave your home. Neither your husband nor his father can force you to leave without a court order - but it is possible to protect any interest you may have (or might acquire in the future) in the home. He is entitled to see his children but he is not necessarily entitled to stay in the house when he visits the children if this is a problem for you, this is something that will be discussed and explained to you when you get that legal advice.

    I realise this must be a terribly difficult time for you at this moment. But taking legal advice now will be the best chance you have of securing your interests for the future - it does not mean that you need to divorce, this advice is about how to protect your home and your ability to provide for his children.

    If your son if suffering from depression, then please contact Young Minds. They will be able to provide help and support and direct you to the best resources. You will find their information by following this link: - or better still make an appointment with your GP.

    I wish you well and if you have any other queries or questions please do not hesitate to come back to us.
    Last edited by Tobias; 30th Dec 2018 at 23:31.
    Tobias - โทเบียส
    It’s better to be 6 feet apart than to be 6 feet under.

  5. #5
    Rookie มือใหม่
    Join Date
    24 Jan 2013


    Thank you so much for all the answers.

    - - - - - - - u p d a t e d - - - - - - -

    Thank you so much for all the answers and information.

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